Lucy came into my life when I was still very young. As much as I would like to say I raised her, she "grew" me up. She lavished me with her affection and in turn I poured love and attention on her. She has ridden in the front seat of our car for her whole life, happily letting her ears flap in the wind. She has sat by my side on lonely nights when I needed a friend. She has seen me through horrible places in my marriage, my families finances, the loss of a baby and in general the crazy daily life of a house filled with little kids. She has welcomed three babies into our home, never once turning on us. She has never bit me, growled at me or turned me away. My family has been blessed by her. She is more than my "fur baby." She is truly my best friend.

In October, we found out that she had Hemangiosarcoma and we were devastated. She wasn't eating. I didn't take her into the vet right away because she still wanted to play outside and run with the kids. When we finally took her in, the vet thought that she might have something lodged in her intestines. The ultrasound showed a tumor the size of a baseball. Without any question, we drained our bank accounts and had her spleen removed and started chemotherapy. We have had three treatments and today Lucy started to have seizures. She has had uncontrollable gas that is a horribly rotten smell. It kills me to think about what must be going on in her system. The ultrasounds show that the tumors have spread throughout her abdomine and now her liver. The vet believes that it must have metasticized to her brain. She has had two seizures today. Both were horrifying to watch although the vet tells us that she feels no pain from them. We will probably have to put her to sleep tomorrow and the idea is devastating to me. I cannot imagine life without my girl, her sweet smell, her kind eyes and her tongue always ready to cover me in kisses.

I have been shocked by how quickly this disease has taken down our beautiful baby. She rests comfortably tonight after a really tough day. She has lost control of her bowels and I find myself cleaning and wiping her. I can't believe that just yesterday, she wanted to play with sticks in the yard and gobbled down her dinner. This disease is heartbreaking at best. If you dog is diagnosed, take the time to love them EVERY minute of the day because they will come to an abrupt end. We are now trying to figure out when is the best time for her to pass rainbow bridge. It will probably be tomorrow and her fight to be with us will be over, but I will never fear that we didn't do everything we could for her. I guess what makes this decision so tough is that she has been there to help me with all the other big decisions in my life and now I have to make the biggest one for her. How can you ever decide when to put a baby to sleep? My vet tells me that she may get up tomorrow and appear normal. I love you, Lucy!

12/11/2010
We brought our baby to Lake Whitehall for her last visit today. She was so peaceful and calm. She mustered the strength to walk around and sniff a bit before laying down to be picked up. We brought her to the vet after and she crossed at noon. My heart is broken and I cannot say enough that I am having a hard time doing basic daily things. I miss her and see her at every turn. I know that slowly the pain will pass and I will think only wonderful loving thoughts of her, but in the interim, the hell that our family is going through is unexplainable. I pray that they find a cure for this disease. It is horrific in its swift spread. I will always love my little baby girl and I will see her again. I know that she will wait for me and I will def run to her and shower her with love and kisses when that time comes. I will forever be greatful for her presence in my life.

Love your dog every minute of the day.