My beloved dog Sasha (Border Collie Mix) I had a small lump at the end of last summer (August 2009). By November, the vet said it is by far the worst cancer he had ever seen in a dog.

The cancer was not only under the skin but it started to ulcerate badly. It was hard to deal with and I felt so bad because the wound would have an odor no matter how much we cleaned it.

But I kept my head up and stayed strong for her. December came and she was scheduled for surgery. They said the surgery was successful, and her ulcers were gone, It was looking up for the best.

The beginning of January was good. By the mid January, Sasha began having a lot of accidents, and her ulcers started opening.

My heart broke for her everyday; I could tell she was in pain. We took my girl to the vet for her last appointment. I can still remember the blood dripping as we lifted her onto the table, and tears running down to the point I couldn't see.

The doctor was telling us he‘s never seen a cancer so bad. As sasha looked at me, I knew what the vet was going to say.

A week later, we tried to give her a good week by giving her treats and letting her get some fresh air, and I would lay next to her on the floor and pet her.

It was Valentines Day and My mother decided we couldn’t let her suffer anymore. I didn't want tomorrow to come, I spent the last few hours with her, I took her paw prints with ink and sat with her, and i talked to her, I tried not to cry in front of her.

I knew she didn’t want to leave me. I sat in the chair. my mom hooked her up to the leash and as she walked by me, I could tell in her eyes she was saying "I dont want to go Emily"

My mom and brother went because I just couldn‘t bear it. It was done. My mom came home and just held me.

I remember the 1st day I got her on my birthday. Sasha was about 4 when we adopted her in 2001. The Humane Society said they found her roaming in a field. Her original name was Two Socks because of her two front feet.

I never felt so close to a animal before. She was my everything.

When she was scared of a thunderstorm she would run to me and sleep in my little twin bed no matter how big she was. I didn’t care. I remember how much she loved being outside chasing tennis balls and barking at deer, and she loved playing with snow, and eating it, Also one of her favorite things to do was go play in puddles after a long fresh rain.

Sasha will live in my heart forever.
I miss you, And a day never goes by that I shed a tear for you

Never give up, Give them lots of love and hugs. And tell them how much you love them, just because they cant speak doesn't mean that they can't understand us. And NEVER tell anyone how long you can grieve, or tell you that its silly to mourn over a dog.